Marko Perković Thompson - Kako Mi Je Teško Noćas

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Don't know what the video is all about... I just love the song. Very much.

Coldplay - Viva La Vida

Nickelback - Someday

More of Trivium (Shogun)

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I've listened through their new album (Shogun) and I've come to love it very, very much. It's not the kind of music I generally listen to but some of their ideas on this album are absolutely brilliant.
My favourite song from the album would still be "Down From The Sky" but I am discovering more and more superb material on it every time I listen through it.

They're awesome.


Trivium - Into The Mouth Of Hell We March




Trivium - Torn Between Scylla and Charybdis

The first 40 seconds of this song are pure birlliance.




And of course...


Trivium - Down From The Sky




Enjoy!

...and other mumbo jumbo

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My father had a(nother) heart attack a few days ago.
My best friend died in a climbing accident.
I've managed to completely alienate one of the most precious people in my life.

I'm mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted.


When did life become such a goddamm pain in the ass?

Eric Clapton - Tears In Heaven

Marilyn Manson - Tainted Love

Guns n' Roses - This I Love

"Guns n' Roses" - Better

A song from "their" (Axel's) new album "Chinese Democracy". I must admitt... I love it.

No one ever told me when I was alone
They just thought I'd know better, better.

No one ever told me when I was alone
They just thought I'd know better, better

The hardest part this troubled heart has never yet been through now,
To heal the scars that got their start inside someone like you now,
But had I known or I'd been shown back when how long It'd take me,
To break the charms that brought me harm...
that, all but would erase me

I never would nor thought I could
No matter what you'd pay me
replay the part
You stole my heart
I should have known you're crazy

If all I knew was that with you
I'd want someone to save me
It'd be enough, but just my luck
I fell in love and baby all that I wanted was

Now I know you better
You know I'd know better,
Now I know you better

So bittersweet, this tragedy wont ask for absolution,
This melody inside of me, still searches for solution,
A twist of fate, the change of heart kills my infatuation,
A broken heart provides the spark for my determination.

No one ever told me when I was alone
They just thought I'd know better, better
Ooh, no one ever told me when I was alone
They just thought I'd know better, better

All that I wanted was
Now I know you better
You know I know better
Now I know you better

(Solo)

I never wanted you to be so full of anger,
I never wanted you to be somebody else
I never wanted you to be someone afraid to know themselves
I only wanted you to see things for yourself

All that I wanted was
Now I know you better
Now we all know better
All that I wanted was

(Solo)

If I were you, I'd manage to abhore the invitation
Of promised love that can't keep up with your adoration
Just use your head, and in the end you'll find your inspiration
To choose your steps and won't regret this kind of aggravation

No one ever told me when I was alone
They just thought I'd know better, better
No one ever told me when I was alone
They just thought I'd know better, better

Who da man???

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I da man!!!

No more Mr. Superman?

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My (selfimposed) tempo is finally catching up with me. Big time. I'm burning out. Literally. For the third time in the past three weeks, I have had a physical melt down. That is, I collapse when I come home. Not lose consciousness but rather drop everything the moment I walk through the door and sleep. Or, another way this happens is, I experience a "being chopped down" feeling - I'm studying or doing whatever and all of a sudden, my body shuts down, leaving me unable to do anything but sleep. Not to mention that, when I experience this feeling, I am having an abnormally hard time climbing up into my bed... About 6 hours of classes and anywhere between 2-4 hours of practicals pretty much every day and up to 30 hours of work every weekend to top it off are "finally" taking their toll.

This week is particularly interesting. So far I've had two exams and a presentation on Monday, have two exams tomorrow, and another exam on Friday. And again... 30 hours of work throughout the weekend... What can I say... life is interesting.

I got lucky at work this Sunday though. Although I was supposed to be the floor manager at the casino I work at, I decided to take advantage of the fact that the place was empty and not much was going on and study at the reception desk. My supervisor noticed this and, as soon as the guy, working a shift that started 2 hours after mine, came to work, told me I could go home. Basically, I was at work for 2 hours instead of the 10 I was supposed to do. And so, while my shift should have ended at 1 am on Monday morning, it ended at 5pm, Sunday afternoon.

Some good has come out of all this though. I earn my own money and I appreciate the time I have to myself so much more. I am still pretty rotten when it comes to finances. I managed to blow most of my first salary within two weeks. Considering I started working in order to buy a new computer, I need to figure out a way to save what I earn...

I am still climbing and am getting into it more and more. And progressing surprisingly fast. While my physicial fittness is nonexistent, the basic climbing skills I mastered in Norway are still there somewhere. It's like ridding a bike I suppose. Once you learn, you can do it for the rest of your life.
I did feel very confused for a while though... about climbing that is... after I learned what happened to Nikos... since at the time I learned this, my evening sessions of climbing were pretty much the only thing that was keeping me sane.

People have been bugging me after Nikos passed away. About how I feel, about how I'm doing... I must admitt I was pretty upset by this. By all the discussions about it. By people leaving R.I.P. comments on his wall on facebook. By the fact that there was a blog made to comemorate him. If people weren't able to appreciate him while he was alive, I found it hypocritical to supposedly do it after his death... Why are people like this? Why am I like this? Why can't we appreciate what we have while we have it? Why does it need to be taken away, before we realise how beautiful and special it was and what an irreplacable role it had in our lives?
If it takes a life of a wonderful human being for certain bonds to be reestablished between people, then I think it is better those bonds remain severed.
One thing that also pushed me off balance (pissed me off) was someone mentioning that he is the 3rd person (of our RCN generation to have died so far). While this is true, I was enraged by the fact that someone could consider a person that was and in many ways still is so close to me as "the 3rd".
Sigh.
I felt guilty that I wasn't better at keeping in touch with him. That's one of the reasons I didn't make cheesy comments on his wall on facebook after he died and didn't want to get into discussions about it and about how I feel.
But inspite of this, somewhere in the back of my head, while he was alive, there was always a possibility. A possibility to see each other, once I'd have enough money to take a trip to Greece. A possibility to write to each other, as we did (both, letters and e-mails), for the first couple of years after graduation. A possibility to see each other at our reunion. And this possibility died with him. And it made me feel empty. To realise that he is gone. For good. No more jokes, letters, discussions about religion, fjord jumping, climbing, smoking together... no more anything.
And while the relationship I was in in Norway, and managed to destroy, hurting someone that is very dear to me, crushed most of my heart to death, his death crushed that little bit that was left.
It took me a few moments to grasp the fact that another one of the people that mean most to me are gone from my life and nothing I can say or do can change that.
This realisation hit me while I was in front of our library. I had learnt of his death while checking my e-mail in the library. And as I walked out, I sat down on a bench and broke into tears...


While life has been pretty difficult these past few weeks, I try to keep my chin up. I am being kept alive by climbing and by people that believe in me.

I need to go. I spent too much time on this. Time I don't have.
But at least I got a few things off my chest.
I need to go study... 3 more exams this week... and I have no intention to, as they say, bend over and accept my destiny...